Song: Camp Stinky

The Camp Stinky Anthem is a tribute to the worst, stinkiest, most putrid camp in all of the world. It caters to grouches and humbugs. This is their song, which is a continual work in Progress.

CAMP STINKY
Words by Jimmy Johnson and Bob Reiss







Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
all the folks will run away
there's trash in all the cabin rooms
that should make a grouches day.

Our food is always very old
dried and cracked and full of mold
some camps have juice and others tea
we have puddle water that taste like Buffalo pee.

Camp Stinky. Camp Stinky
where the staff don't give a dam
welcome to our complaint department
now why don't you just "SCRAM!!!!"

Some camps have lots of fun,
things to do all day
Camp Stinky's pool is full of mud
and the lifeguards ran away.

Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
where the grounds are full of trash
the beds are rough, so you'll toss and turn
and probably get a rash

Some camps have a petting zoo
we just have a sty
you can probably play rotten fruit dodge ball
but you might just lose an eye.

Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
our nurses are quite mean
their hands are cold and their voices harsh
and they smell like gasoline

Some camps have a rousing tune
they sing with style and glee
our camp's song is really dumb
and sung quite out of key.

Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
You'd stay away if you're smart
our camp director is crazy
and smells like a day old fart.

Our camp band is called The Trash
they don't have a single fan
their shows are always full of grouches
but not a single man.

Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
all your wheelchairs will get stuck
cause the grass is dead and the dirt is wet
instead of sidewalks there's just muck.

We only hire the worst of the lot,
too lazy to meet your wishes
they'll throw your luggage in the mud,
and feed you off dirty dishes.

Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
our horses will give you fleas.
our woods contain only grumpy squirrels
who will try to bite your knees.

We only celebrate one Holiday a year
We call it The Day of the Grouches
We'll pass around the warm Worm-Ade
as we sit on rotten couches.

Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
You can't find it on any map
the gate is only open 2 minutes a day
and it's covered in sticky sap.

Our camp flag is quite distinct
the color of a rotten yam
our motto represents our greatest creed
Camp Stinky "Get away, now. SCRAM!!!"

Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
going nowhere would be better
It's never sunny. It only rains.
and the roofs just get you wetter.

Every year when the State inspects
we fail each and every code
they found slugs in the fridge one year
and some rats in the commode.

Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
on the top of Mount Picanose
where the trees are full of green glop
that will fall right on your toes.

Some camps are know for their scenic views
or beaches as white as a pearl
our camp is known for it's awful smell
that just might make you hurl.

Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
don't forget about Oscar's Group
a club for complaining and general malaise
and for eating Stink Beetle Soup.

Most camp patrons are full of smiles
and lots of happy cheers
our camp is full of grouches
who have been depressed for many years.

Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
we cater to the louts
if you want a good night sleep
our staff will scream and shout.

The headline in "The Grouch Review"
says Camp Stinky is the worst
Any kids expecting fun
will have their bubble burst.

Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
rated two thumbs down!!
by the famous Roger Grouchbert
and every one in town.

One year at another camp
I was on the softball team
but the only sport at Camp Stinky
is to make the children scream.

Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
will make you lose your mind
you'll scream and yell and hide in trees
and bite you dog's behind.

Some Sesame Street friends have been there
like Bob, Mr. Hooper and Maria
Yet Camp Stinky drove them all away
and gave them diarrhea.


Camp Stinky, Camp Stinky
It will make your stomach turn
Your skin will itch and your hair fall out
And your armpits will start to burn.